"i need."
"asap."
"right now, in 10 minutes, an hour ago, yesterday."
"urgent."
"red flag."
"I NEED NOW."
Seemingly small phrases. Little words composed of letters in the alphabet. That is all they are right? These tiny phrases, when compiled into an aggregate heaping fucking pile of obnoxious bold emails with pesky little red flags stuck through their fleshy middle sides, are much more than tiny phrases. No, people, these demanding, rude, condescending statements of business need, want, must-have-ness, are much more than that. These phrases are unnecessary parts of the corporate monster of "classy" white collar business in this "great country" of ours.
I implore you, all of you who may or may not ever stumble across this tiny little blog of mine, but if you are here reading this, then yes, I IMPLORE you. colleagues, business people, ad executives, clients, directors, lawyers, auditors...yes i implore each and every single one of you to take a moment to just PAUSE, stop your fingers in their hasty obnoxious paths, before typing out these pesky nasty phrases to those people on whom you depend to provide you that oh-so-very-important information you need. Just stop. Seriously. Stop the track from your brain to your keys and think, don't drop or roll but do stop. These rude urgent phrases just might make you less apt to get what you need; yes, you might very well just be stabbing your own bottom line in the bottom of its proverbial P&L foot by hastily typing out unneededly and unnicedly (fake news, fake word I know but forgive me in my own mid-work day hasty blogging moment) rude little sayings.
I implore you: see what happens if you just abandon these actions...Instead of "i need now", "send asap", "no options otherwise", how about "i appreciate if you...", "could you please", you know what forget the "could you", just add a simple "please". Yes, colleagues, comrades, clients and companions, please kindly take a moment to think before you speak, type, write, dictate, Alexa-ate, Siri-ize, engage in whatever form of e-communication you prefer to leverage, and ponder taking a potentially and alternately more tolerable approach to it. You just may make someone else's fucking day a little brighter...and have your urgent deliverable delivered with just a little bit more urgency on the other end.
Namaste and to all, a wonderful day.
Warm, kind, and all the best regards,
Rachel
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