Monday, November 4, 2013

I still love black, but OITNB is the new best

These words will likely never exit my lips, er fingertips, ever again, but I am not in a writing mood today. Yes, that's right, it's #writersblockmonday. Shame on me. But alas, I am going to attempt to make an at least half-assed effort to share my feeling about the epicness of Orange is the New Black. Well, maybe quarter-assed. But I'll do my best.

In typical fashion, I'm totally behind the TV times. To quote my graciously sarcastic co-worker, apparently I make a habit of watching popular shows six to nine months after their hay day. I'm working on that, really I am. But yes, just a little over a couple weeks ago, after drowning in my tears from finishing the epic Breaking Bad, I needed something new to watch. I'd seen that little Orange and Black icon taunting me for weeks every time I went into Netflix so I finally made the decision that it was next up on the queue. Orange is the New Black, here I come. 

Well, had I had any bit of inclination as to the total awesomeness of this show before now, I most certainly would have defied my usual behind-the-times viewing trend. I wish I had known because, wow. OITNB is total fucking perfection. Pardon my French but seriously. This show has everything I could ever ask for out of television: psychological drama, dark humor (black like the color of my heart... thanks, Ms. Griz), lezzy love affairs, ahem,  cat fights and prison. What more could a girl ask for?! 

There is literally not one thing I don't totally and utterly adore about OITNB. Well, maybe the lack of fashion but not really. I mean, personally, I would not be able to rock those orange and tan scrubs but Pipes & Alex, you ladies rock them like stars. Plus there's my decidedly unstraight crush on Laura Prepon's cold-as-rocks Alex Vause. Love her. If I could be or be with someone in prison, it would most definitely be Alex -- great voice, great hair, great glasses. Well, before they got smashed, that is.

In any case, in the effort of keeping this a snackable tribute blog post, I'll leave it at that. Suffice to say, OITNB is most definitely the new best bet on Netflix and really, anywhere. So if you haven't taken the orange prison plunge yet, take it from me, you need to. Like, right now. Don't be afraid of what you don't know. In the words of one particular inmate, really, it ain't all that bad.

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